G and I recently read an article about the classic, unforgettable faking-orgasm, dinner scene in the movie, When Harry Met Sally (1989), starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal. He thinks he’s a great lover but Ryan reminds him that women are expert at faking orgasms, and many could have faked them in order to please him which, of course, he stubbornly refuses to believe. To prove her point, she puts on a legendary convincing faking -orgasm performance which, between you and me, was so good that I thought she was enjoying herself so much that it was the real thing! But that’s another story.
The talented director, Rob Reiner, in an attempt to coach Ryan on how to portray the scene, acted out a faking –orgasm moment and, according to Ryan, he worked up a mighty sweat doing it. Maybe he, like Ryan, may have enjoyed it, if you know what I mean. But that’s also another story!
But here’s a delightful, impromptu event. Reiner’s mother, Estelle, was in the movie playing the role of a diner sitting at the next table. After Ryan performed her orgasm scene, she suggested to her son that she should say, “I’ll have what she’s having.” And her son agreed after which it went viral even to this day it is talked about among those older than our Millennials.
Reiner, with his innate sense of humor remarked, “How sick is this? I’m doing this in front of my mother.”
Anyway, this article got G and me talking about our thoughts on both sexes faking orgasms. Most of what is written and discussed deals with women doing it. We concluded that it’s probably due to the fact, for whatever reasons, it is more common with women because women have more reasons for faking it. Also, it’s easier for them to do because they don’t ejaculate like men. For sure, the wearing of a condom makes it easier for men but many don’t wear them, particularly since many women are on oral contraceptives. Also, most men don’t use them with women past the child-bearing age. Surveys report that condom- less men also fake orgasms and supposedly get away with it. It’s puzzling how. Here’s another fact that’s puzzling. It’s the erection. In many men who lose interest, it disappears! So how can they fake it?
G and I both strongly believe that the art of faking orgasms lightens the burden of life, particularly for women. This point has unforgivingly been absent from the professional and lay media. Our lives are being effectively inundated with way overrated messages about the wonders of sex. It’s as if your phantasies should be fulfilled every time you copulate. It just ain’t so. Not even close. Many times one partner, either the man or the woman, have no interest in copulating or indulging in other types of sexual acts. Even if they do, they quickly get it over with after their happy moment searching for immediate peace and quiet.
The reasons behind faking orgasms are multiple most boiling down to “just not being in the mood” but oftentimes just wanting to please the partner. Commonly, particularly in married and working women, they’re just plain tired or under stress worrying about problems regarding their kids at school or financial obligations or the pain- in- the- ass boss at work. Also, many are not turned on by their partners at that or any moment or, as I mentioned before, not that interested in sex in general, an underappreciated but common feeling. There are, of course, other reasons that you ladies and gentlemen are well aware of and need no explanation from G and me!
Now to faking it, and why, in many cases, it’s essential: We are assuming that, except for the powerfully hormone driven young, most men and women would like to please their lovers. Driven by our sexual revolution, American young males remind us of the American bison commonly incorrectly called a buffalo. A couple of months before mating, the bison has a huge sexual surge in his testosterone and urge to copulate but the females in the herd are not yet ready to accept penile insertion. He, out there in the plains, wants to eliminate competition so he fights other male bisons, sometimes even to the death and loses much of his body weight in doing so. Then, when he senses that the lady bison is in heat, he somehow locates her in the herd, mounts her and strokes away for only 15 seconds to have his happy moment after which he walks away forever! Such is the immense power of the young male sex drive.
So what’s our point? Unless one is a bison there is a lot of psychology in having an orgasm. Though there are little good clinical data on this subject, common sense and experience tells us that most men and women, in addition to their personal pleasure and deep down feelings, want to share sexual intercourse with their mates. And many times the best way to accomplish this altruistic goal is by faking orgasms! It’s nothing more than a “white lie” which oftentimes makes life easier.
As I was about to post this piece, I thought whether G had experiences with women faking orgasms. I also thought that he, with his track record of pleasing about 300 women, would be, like Billy Crystal, and deny that it could possibly happen to a man who made love to more women than Casanova.
The first response I elicited from him after asking the question was a hearty burst of laughter. “Sure it happened. I may be good but I ain’t that good.” He wholeheartedly agrees that the white-lie art of faking orgasms, in many cases, can make for a more harmonious sex life.
G and I have received more than a few requests to talk more about the book. In our conversations we frequently refer to it throughout all our blogs without mentioning its content. We decided to publish the table of contents but, much to our surprise, Endorfina beat us to it in a previous post (Cupid Bragina by Endorfina). So, instead, we decided to post the reviews that are mentioned on the book jacket. Here goes:
“Hold on to your skirts, Ladies. It’s going to be a bumpy ride that will knock your panties off! I can understand why women read this book in 48 hours!” –After Dark Show with Ande Lyons
“’G’, the anonymous hyper-sexual subject of Lorenzo Baccalà’s steamy and generally compelling book…Though readers may sigh on occasion over G’s oversized Id and his obvious womanizing, they’re just as likely to pull up a velvet seat and hear more.” -Blueink
“Baccalà writes well and the story flows easily. It is little tidbits that excite more discussion…Chapters are short and can easily be read by one partner to another as a form of foreplay which tremendously increases the utility of the book.” -Foreword Clarion
“A quick, lighthearted skip through one man’s sexual conquests … full of reflections unclouded by political correctness or incredulity… the book explores everything from the finer points of oral sex … to differences among Asian women.” -Kirkus Indie
“When you read the title you might think this is a tell-all about a man who thought he was the best lover, and although the man knew his limits, he also understood the interaction. The book is written as a series of interviews or conversations between two old friends, the author and G. Whether it is actually a true story or not doesn’t really effect the story. G explains to his friend, who is quite skeptical at first all the adventures of his life. He has learned what is pleasing to a man and a woman, and how to achieve maximum pleasure. As you read the book, each chapter talks about a different act or circumstance and how it worked best and what made it memorable and enlightening. If anything, it could be used as a manual by men and women alike to understand the other better and learn to pleasure each other a little more than looking out for themselves. There are a number of topics, some which might not appeal to some readers, but overall I felt it was more of a book meant to make people think about how they approach sexual interactions, and maybe, just maybe change a little of that thinking to make it all that much better.” -Michelle Randall
There are also a number of reviews on Amazon.com by men and women who have read the book. If any of you do read the book we’d like to hear from you by posting your opinions- yes, we can handle negative ones- on Amazon.